The Boat Metaphor of Depression
Depression is like trying to cross the ocean of life without a boat. You're constantly drowning and you fight wave after challenging wave on your own. Worse, you can see everyone else in their boats as they pass by you and leave you behind. Some of them have yachts, some have row boats, every boat is different. But most people you see in life have boats of some form or another. You may have had a boat once yourself even. But now you don't. Now you just gotta keep your head above water. Therapy and medication is a life jacket and the therapist will teach you how to build a boat for yourself from scratch. Some people have boats that are defective, that work but have a leak. Therapy in their case will teach them who to repair the boat. But it's hard, building or repairing a boat, while trying to stay afloat, in the middle of the ocean.
Certain activities allow you to ride in temporary boats, little cardboard ones that will eventually sink. This depends on you and what activity gives you a boat for a few hours. For me, being with loved ones or my therapist is like riding in their boat for a little while. It’s nice. I feel like I’m free from fighting those challenging waves on my own. But eventually I’m always thrust back into the ocean to swim on my own, with my life jacket, trying to build my own boat.
When I’m home alone, I’m swimming on my own. It’s terrible but at least I don’t see all the strangers in their boats passing me by, practically taunting me with their boat privilege. But occasionally you see another swimmer. You see someone who is lacking a boat as well, who may even be drowning. It’s nice to know you’re not alone in this boat world. When I see these people, I’m grateful for my life jacket, I’m grateful for the tools and supplies I’m using to build myself a boat, even if I won’t finish it by the time I reach the other side of the ocean, I’m grateful to be building it.
This post first appeared on my Tumblr https://ragerageagainstthedyinglight.tumblr.com/ in 2015.